40 strokes

Well, after my exertions yesterday I thought I'd go for something a little less energetic. I quick dip in the pool, a few gentle lengths up and down. The gym membership comes with a pool pass, so I decided to give it a go.

The car park looked ominously empty when I pulled up. I thought it was shut, but no, there were three lads in the pool, and two sleepy looking life-guards. I wrestled myself into my swimming costume and tried not to look totally conspicuous as I climbed into the water. This is difficult if you are the only moving object in the room, and at least two of the people present are paid to watch you.

Swimming is supposed to be the best exercise, isn't it? It uses all the muscles but cushions the joints. So I swam up and down. After the first dozen or so lengths, the three boys got out, so I swam up and down on my own, with my own personal bodyguards watching out for my safety.

Eventually six staff members arrived and got in the pool for a training session. Out of the corner of my eye it looked like they were practicing synchronised swimming. When I looked more closely it turned out they were practicing a life-saving technique on each other. I bet they do synchronised swimming when I'm not there.

I did 40 lengths and felt very virtuous. According to the NutriStrategy websiteI have used up 863 calories, or would have if I'd swum for a whole hour, and not just 45 minutes. This appears to be one of the more efficient calorie burning activities. Riding a bike very, very fast for an hour burns off over 1300, but I challenge you to actually cycle like a bat out of hell for that length of time without falling off or getting cramp. The least energy wasting activity listed is ice fishing (i.e. sitting really, really still in the cold) at a mere 173 calories burned per hour.

I don't think I fancy that either.